One of my mentors (who has no clue he is my mentor!) sent an email the other day talking about the victim mindset. It was so good I wanted to share a portion of it with you!
‘The movies, the media, most parents, most everyone in the culture teach us to get used to being at the mercy of circumstance. All power seems to be out there in the hands of events, companies, politicians and other people. We learn that. It’s deeply drilled into us.’ – Steve Chandler
This made me pause and think about ‘the mercy of circumstances’.
So, where are you at the mercy of circumstance?
Where is an outside influence being focused on rather than an internal choice?
Who are you blaming? What are you blaming for how your life is going?
I notice myself now getting easily triggered when someone is blaming me for their circumstance. Triggered may be too strong of a word, but it is the one I am going with for now.
Since working on my own emotional intelligence, I am sensitive to catabolic energy. (Reminder: catabolic energy is a draining and depleting energy) I now typically reside in the anabolic energies. (Reminder: anabolic energy is constructive and healing energy)
When I feel internal frustration or resentment, I pause and look around me. Is this my own feeling or is this a feeling being projected onto me? Sometimes it is my own shit, sometimes it is others stuff. This is how I am creating my experience versus being a victim to my circumstance. Awareness is where it all starts.
This was something that I’ve had to learn. While I am human and react to things, I have taught myself to question why I am feeling what I am feeling (the catabolic energies.) However, prior to focusing on my EQ, I was always viewing the world as being done to me; not the creator of my experience.
I no longer am the victim/at the mercy of my circumstance.
This is what shifted me from being a victim to an owner of my life.
We are taught to not have power in our lives. We are spoon fed everywhere to keep that belief as it is fact. However, you are more powerful than you know! And that is what I love letting my clients see about their lives.
I take them out of their victimhood and create them to be the owners of their lives so that THEY can be empowered to be in control of their lives.
You do not have to stay in the belief of being a victim to your circumstance. Are you ready to shift your narrative?